A longing heart trying to trust the Lord

This entry has taken me a few days to write and I'm not quite sure why. A lot of thinking, almost writing something of substance, saving, thinking, and coming back to work on it more. I'm back in Virginia Beach with a house to myself, not a lot of close friends in the area, still on the job hunt, and missing Central Oregon a lot.


There's a lot I miss about the Canyon and Central Oregon. The traffic isn't ridiculous wherever you go, every store isn't super crowded all time, there's no sales tax, no humidity, very little rain, and well the list can go on and on of the shallow things.


I think the things that I really miss may seem small, but really have significant meanings and can't really be redone in any other fashion. I really miss the family adventures and family devotions I had with the Browns. I LOVED exploring Oregon with them. I miss writing on egg shells before they've be use so people can have fun or encouraging things to read as they're cooking or baking. I miss having "fights" with my brother and sister which consisted of flicking each other in the forehead. I miss laying on a hammock under the vast Central Oregon sky getting lost in conversations with the Lord.


I miss not having to lock the door when you leave the house. I miss having the ability of leaving your car keys in the car. I miss the fact that your neighbors are automatically your friends. I miss coming in from work and being greeted with "Hey sis, how was work?" and a hug. I miss being comfortable in my own skin and knowing who I was and what I want in life. I miss living with my best friends. I miss the simple, slow life that the Canyon can bring.


Sometimes explaining they why behind why I love and miss these things is the hard part. I think the more I have lived the life I love, the more I am able to express what it looks like and the whys won't be as hard to explain. In the mean time, I think I have a new prayer to pray. I still want to get back to the Canyon more than anything, but slightly more than that I want to be where the Lord wants me to be and I can start praying for that kind of life wherever the Lord calls me. Sometimes it isn't easy, but the Lord is good, He is faithful, and He has a plan for our lives that exceed our plans for life. So thankful for that.